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Swingers Share the Rules Many Couples Follow in Non-Monogamous Relationships
Bella and Jase, a married couple who have been part of the swinging lifestyle for over a decade, recently shared the “golden rules” that many couples use to keep things healthy and respectful. They explained these in a TikTok series, aiming to break down what really happens behind the scenes of non-monogamous relationships.
Who They Are
The pair, high school sweethearts turned content creators, spend much of their time on “spicy cruises” — luxury trips designed for singles and couples interested in exploring open relationships. They also run their own website, 4ourplay, to help normalize the lifestyle and provide resources for others.
The Common Rules Couples Follow
- Same-room encounters only – All sexual activity happens together, not separately.
- Protection is mandatory – Safe sex is a strict requirement.
- No climaxing with others – Many couples agree that ejaculation should only happen with their partner.
- Group chats only – Messaging outside the couple is limited to group conversations to avoid secrecy.
- Equal play for everyone – No one should be left out; all parties receive equal attention.
- No kissing above the neck – Some couples set boundaries that keep kissing off-limits to preserve intimacy at home.
- Soft swap only – In some arrangements, only oral sex is allowed, with penetration off the table.
- STI test checks – It’s common for couples to ask to see recent results before playing.
- No “taking one for the team” – No one should feel pressured to take part if they’re uncomfortable.
Why Rules Matter
Bella and Jase stress that these rules aren’t about restricting fun – they’re about ensuring respect, trust, and safety for everyone involved. Boundaries help couples maintain their connection while still exploring outside experiences.
